Obsessive compulsive disorder - OCD treatment and therapy from NOCD

Why do I feel like I’m getting dumber?

By Yusra Shah

Oct 25, 202413 minute read

Reviewed byMichaela McCloud

As you go through life, your brain is constantly taking in and processing information. Every day, every minute, every second. And every day, every minute, and every second, new information develops, new ideas become popular, and new discoveries are made. When it feels like things are moving faster than you can keep up, it can make you feel like you’re slowing down.

Maybe that means it takes you a bit longer to understand something, whether it’s a new popular meme or solving a multiplication problem in your head. That small feeling of confusion or hesitation can feel a little alarming. You might ask yourself: Shouldn’t I know this? Do all the younger people get this? Am I getting dumber? 

Feeling like you’re ‘losing it’ or thinking that you are stupid can actually be influenced by a lot of things—stress, lack of sleep, anxiety, or even just the sheer volume of information you’re dealing with every day. It’s important to recognize that these factors can impact how you think and feel, rather than assuming your intelligence is fading.

I feel like I am getting dumber. Why?

There are a lot of factors that can make you feel less intelligent than you are, but it is important to know that intelligence does not really change over time. Dr. Patrick McGrath, Chief Clinical Officer at NOCD, says “Intelligence is a pretty static thing. What we might do is lose memory, and the ability to recall things, but… it’s not necessarily intelligence that decreases over time.” While some of our skills or abilities might shift, our overall intelligence remains stable. 

Intelligence is a pretty static thing. What we might do is lose memory, and the ability to recall things, but… it’s not necessarily intelligence that decreases over time.


Dr. Patrick McGrath

According to Howard Gardner’s theory of multiple intelligences there are different forms of intelligence beyond a person’s IQ. These types of intelligence cover language, logic, mathematics, spatial-visual skills, music, interpersonal and emotional skills, nature, bodily movement, and existentialism. Gardner’s theory suggests that intelligence isn’t just one thing; it’s more about understanding the different ways people can be smart. It’s a helpful way to figure out your strengths and what comes naturally to you. So, even if society tends to measure intelligence in specific ways, it doesn’t mean that being suited to a different kind of intelligence makes you any less capable or smart. 

Just because certain abilities might change over time or you find yourself more aligned with a different form of intelligence, it doesn’t mean you’re getting dumber. You might find that certain skills, like quick problem-solving, feel different or take more time. But that doesn’t mean you’re getting dumber. It just means that your strengths are evolving. In fact, you might notice that other forms of intelligence, like emotional insight, creativity, or wisdom, grow stronger as you gain more life experience. 

That said, there are factors that might make you feel less smart, which can be mistaken for a decline in your abilities. While it’s understandable to feel this way, it doesn’t truly reflect a change in your intelligence. Let’s explore some reasons behind this perception.

Overthinking

One thing that can cause you to feel less intelligent is overthinking—repeatedly analyzing situations, interactions, or thoughts, often to the point where it becomes overwhelming. If you find yourself constantly worrying about how you come across to others, replaying what you said or did and questioning how people perceive you, it’s easy to start doubting your intelligence. When you dwell on these thoughts, you might think about them so much that you convince yourself that you’ve done something wrong, even when it’s not necessarily true.  

For example, if you make a mistake in a speech and are stuck thinking about it, convincing yourself that everyone must think you’re so dumb, that is just your perception. The people listening to the speech might not have even noticed the mistake, and don’t think any differently about your intelligence or abilities. However, if you are telling yourself that you are dumb and others think that, it can begin to feel very real.

Dr. McGrath notes, “Perception can be reality for many people.” By overthinking, you’re often creating a version of reality based on your own thoughts and emotions, not necessarily the overall facts. While this version might feel true for you, it doesn’t mean that everyone around you is viewing the situation in the same way. 

Overthinking can distort your self-perception, making you feel less capable or intelligent, even though these feelings are not grounded in fact. It’s important to remember that just because you see your actions in a certain light, it doesn’t mean others do too.

Neurodivergence

Society often uses neurotypical functioning as the standard, even though not everyone fits that mold. If you’re neurotypical, your brain processes information in a way that’s considered typical. If you’re neurodivergent, you think and process things differently than most people your age. What feels “normal” for others might not feel that way for you, and that’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’re less capable—it just means your brain works differently. While neurodivergence itself isn’t a diagnosis, it can often indicate conditions like ADHD, autism, or dyslexia, which are linked to neurological function.

“Being neurodivergent can make you feel less intelligent when you realize you don’t understand social experiences the same way others naturally seem to—it’s like there are rules that we aren’t aware of that everyone else knows,” says NOCD therapist April Kilduff, MA, LCPC, LMHC, LPCC, LPC.

“But,” Kilduff continues, “we have to remember that our ways of socializing are just different, not wrong.”

It’s important to recognize that differences in how we think or process information don’t define our worth. Embracing these differences and understanding that there are many ways to navigate the world can make you feel better about yourself overall.

Being neurodivergent can make you feel less intelligent when you realize you don’t understand social experiences the same way others naturally seem to… but we have to remember that our ways of socializing are just different, not wrong.


April Kilduff, MA, LCPC

Mental health conditions

Mental health conditions can affect our thought processes and perceptions. This may lead to thoughts that we are dumb, or getting dumber. 

Social anxiety

Social anxiety, which involves the fear of being judged or negatively evaluated by others, can create situations where you feel incapable or inadequate. When you’re so focused on how others might perceive you, simple tasks like ordering coffee at a drive-thru can feel overwhelming. You might compare yourself to people who do these tasks everyday and start to feel like you’re lacking something. However, this doesn’t mean you lack intelligence, even though the stress and debilitation you feel from social anxiety can make it feel that way.

With proper support, such as exposure and response prevention therapy (ERP), these challenges can become easier to manage. Using ERP to treat social anxiety could involve slowly exposing yourself to situations where you worry about being judged, like practicing ordering coffee. Instead of avoiding the situation or seeking reassurance, you’ll work with your therapist to sit with the discomfort and ride out the anxiety. Over time, you’ll start to see that you can handle these situations, and that the fears your anxiety convinces you of  don’t actually come true.

Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)

OCD is a mental health condition that  involves repetitive intrusive thoughts, images, feelings, and urges known as obsessions. These obsessions can be overwhelming and bring up feelings of extreme distress, which can be debilitating in some cases. In order to cope with this distress and find relief as quickly as possible, people with OCD perform repetitive actions or behaviors called compulsions. However, since compulsions only provide temporary relief, the OCD cycle continues on. 

If you have OCD, you might find yourself feeling stuck on certain thoughts or avoiding specific situations. For example, if you’re at dinner with friends and have a fear of germs, you might bring your own silverware set with you instead of using what is provided at the restaurant. This could make you feel embarrassed or appear weird to those around you because they think it’s strange that you can’t use restaurant silverware like everyone else. You might think your actions look dumb and that others are judging you for it, but the way you act is simply a reflection of how OCD impacts your thought processes and behavior.

These compulsions can sometimes feel very embarrassing and isolating. You might worry your friends think your silverware habits are weird, or you might feel judged by the waiter. These negative thoughts can be very hurtful to your overall well being, so if your OCD is causing you to feel dumb or stupid, getting professional help can be a good step in regaining control of the narrative.

Working with a therapist trained in OCD treatment, like exposure and response prevention therapy (ERP), can make a big difference. In ERP, you work to slowly and carefully expose yourself to situations that trigger your obsessions. Your therapist will help you to learn how to sit with the anxiety these obsessions bring without engaging in compulsions. ERP teaches you strategies to break the OCD cycle, helping you develop more adaptive ways of managing your thoughts and reducing compulsive behaviors.

It’s important to remember that having a mental health condition doesn’t define your intelligence. Struggling with certain thoughts or behaviors doesn’t mean you’re dumb; it just means your brain works a little differently. Different doesn’t mean bad—it simply means that with the right support, you can find ways to navigate these challenges and recognize your own strengths.

Habits and behaviors that can reinforce feeling dumb

Feeling like you’re getting ‘dumber’ or worrying about your intelligence can often be tied to common habits that may not be serving you. A lot of it comes down to the content we choose and how we interact with it. Dr. McGrath asks, “Why do we care what certain families on reality shows are doing this week?  Why does that matter?  How does that improve our lives in any way whatsoever, versus watching a show on PBS or something to learn about the new telescope or to learn about what we hope to discover in the world?” 

The type of media we consume can make us feel a certain way. If we spend most of our time watching reality TV and not focusing on things that mentally engage us, it’s easy to start feeling like we’re less capable. On the other hand, if we spend time watching documentaries or shows with real, meaningful themes, we’re actively engaging our minds. The important thing is to be intentional about how we consume media and choose content that leaves us feeling good about ourselves and our choices—not the opposite.

Dr. McGrath also points out that our attention spans have gotten shorter. Bite-sized media like Reels and TikToks can make it hard to stay focused on longer, more complex things because we’re so used to quick and easy content. As our attention span gets shorter, it can affect how we engage with things that actually require more focus, making us feel less sharp and often, dumber. 

If you try to be more aware of how you spend your time and engage with your content of choice, you can start to work against these bad habits and in turn, potentially feel better about yourself.

Here are some habits that might be draining your mental energy without you realizing it:

1. Procrastination

  • Putting things off can lead to a cycle of stress and self-doubt. When you’re rushing to finish something at the last minute, it’s easy to feel like you don’t have all the answers, don’t know what you’re doing, or how to do it, even though it’s just the stress talking. To avoid procrastination, try setting specific timelines and goals for the tasks you want to complete and incentivize yourself to stick to your plan.

2. Multitasking

  • Constantly juggling multiple tasks can actually make it harder to focus and be productive overall. When you’re spreading your attention too thin, it can feel like you’re not doing well at any one of your tasks, which can lead to feeling inadequate or less capable. Instead of multitasking, try focusing on one thing at a time. This can help you put all your energy into something without shifting your focus. 

3. Not getting enough sleep

  • Sleep is crucial for our brains to function properly. When you’re running on empty, it’s hard to think clearly, remember things, and stay focused. Feeling foggy or unfocused when you’re tired doesn’t mean you’re not smart—it just means you need rest. Try to go to bed and wake up at the same time every day and incorporate good sleep hygiene into your nightly routine.

4. Mindless screen time

  • Spending hours scrolling through social media or watching mindless videos can leave you feeling drained and unproductive. When your brain isn’t engaged with something meaningful, it’s natural to feel like you’re not using your time wisely. If you struggle with being on your phone too long and end up doom scrolling, try setting time usage limits for the specific apps you over use on your phone. Your phone can then let you know when you’re going over your personal limit and help you stop.

5. Negative self-talk

  • Telling yourself things like ‘I’m stupid’ or ‘I’m dumb’ can become a habit, and over time, it can start to feel real. This self-criticism can damage your confidence and make you doubt your abilities, even when it’s not true. To help with this, you can incorporate meditation and mindfulness into your routine, as well as starting or ending your day with positive affirmations about yourself.

6. Over-reliance on technology

  • It’s so easy to look up quick answers online instead of working through a problem or trying to remember solutions on your own. But constantly turning to your phone or computer can make you feel less confident. It’s okay if finding the answer on your own takes a little bit more time. That is normal and natural. Not everything needs to be done at the speed of light.

7. Poor nutrition and lack of exercise

  • Your diet and activity have a huge impact on your brain. A diet that’s lacking in nutrients or a lack of physical activity can affect your concentration, memory, and overall focus, which might make you feel less yourself than usual. Try eating more well balanced meals with whole foods that keep you satisfied throughout the day and make sure you are able to move your body a little bit each day— even if it’s just going on a light walk outside.

8. Using substances

  • Drinking alcohol or using substances can impair cognitive function and memory. If your substance use becomes a habit more than an occasional thing, it can create a cycle where you feel more dull, making it tough to concentrate and do simple tasks. If you feel like your drug or alcohol use is a problem, talk to your therapist or contact the SAMHSA National Helpline (1800-622-HELP) which is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week for free and confidential assistance.

Being mindful of these habits and seeing where you can make small changes can help you feel more capable and confident in your everyday life. It’s about finding a balance that supports you, while making sure you’re treating yourself and your body in the right way.

How can I feel better about myself?

Feeling better about yourself starts with looking at your actions and how they match up with your definition of intelligence. “Are you doing behaviors that then would help to promote what you feel is intelligent?” asks Dr. McGrath. “How are you defining intelligence? And then how is your behavior related to that?” Understanding how you perceive your intelligence is closely tied to the things and qualities you associate with being smart.

If you find yourself admiring people who seem confident and capable in areas where you feel you’re lacking, it might be helpful to ask yourself if you’re engaging in similar habits. “If you’re seeing people do things that you think, ‘Wow, they’ve really got it together’ and you’re not doing the things they’re doing, start doing them,” says Dr. McGrath. By making small changes to align your actions with the traits you admire, you can build your confidence and start feeling more smart and less dumb.

Keep in mind that intelligence isn’t just about being book-smart. Dr. McGrath points out that “There’s an emotional intelligence that people experience as well as an intellectual intelligence.” Feeling better about yourself can also come from working on your emotional skills, like understanding your feelings, seeking mental health support, and practicing mindfulness. Focusing on both your intellectual and emotional growth can give you a fuller, more balanced sense of self-worth.

Bottom line

Feeling better about yourself is about making intentional choices that reflect the person you want to be. If you feel like you are dumb, ask yourself if you are engaging in behaviors you don’t feel good about. Whether it’s taking time to learn something new, practicing self-care, or seeking therapy, these steps can help you feel more in control and connected to the values that matter to you.

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