Expecting a child is a huge life change—and with it can come a wave of new emotions, responsibilities, and expectations. When OCD is also part of the picture, this transition can feel even more intense. Whether you’re the one carrying the baby or supporting someone who is, OCD might start to speak louder during this time. Intrusive thoughts may spike, compulsions may feel harder to resist, and it’s easy to wonder, “Why does it feel like I’m going backward?”
You’re not alone. It’s actually very common for OCD to become more activated you’re expecting a child. But that doesn’t mean something is wrong with you or your recovery. It means you’re going through something big, and OCD, like it always does, is trying to latch onto it. The good news? You and your partner can get through it together—with compassion, support, and some solid strategies.
Here are seven ways to manage OCD when welcoming a new baby into your family, no matter which role you’re in.
1. Know that stress can make OCD louder—and that’s okay
OCD tends to flare up during times of transition, and expecting a baby (including the time postpartum) is one of the biggest transitions a person can go through. “Having a child is a stressor and OCD loves a stressor,” says Dr. Patrick McGrath, Chief Clinical Officer at NOCD. If you’ve noticed that symptoms feel more intense lately—maybe your thoughts are more frequent, or your rituals feel more necessary—it doesn’t mean you’re back at square one. It just means your brain is reacting to change.
Rather than viewing this as a setback, try to gently acknowledge it for what it is: a bump in the road. OCD thrives on urgency and fear, so the more you can remind yourself that this discomfort is temporary and manageable, the more you reclaim control.
Having a child is a stressor and OCD loves a stressor. If you’ve noticed that symptoms feel more intense lately, it doesn’t mean you’re back at square one. It just means your brain is reacting to change.
Dr. Patrick McGrath
2. Understand that hormonal shifts can affect symptoms
When you’re expecting a child, hormones can impact everything from mood to energy to sleep, and they can absolutely influence how OCD shows up. “This is just a common thing that we see,” Dr. McGrath explains. “It’s nothing to be alarmed about… it’s just kind of how it goes.” If your usual coping strategies don’t seem to be working as well, or you’re noticing new intrusive thoughts you haven’t experienced before, it doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. It means your body is doing something very normal.
This can be a good time to adjust expectations and practice self-compassion. You’re dealing with physical and emotional changes at the same time—and that’s a lot. Try not to judge your symptoms too harshly or assume they’ll last forever. As your hormones regulate, so will your mind.
3. Set boundaries with compulsive Googling and over-researching
It’s natural to want answers when you’re waiting for your baby. But for people with OCD, information-seeking can become compulsive—especially when it’s driven by the need to feel 100% certain. You might find yourself spending hours researching symptoms, risks, or parenting advice, only to feel more anxious afterward. That’s because the urge to find the “right” answer is often coming from OCD, not curiosity.
Dr. McGrath emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries with this type of behavior. “We know that safety behaviors do not make OCD better,” he says. Try limiting the time you spend looking things up, and when possible, rely on one or two trusted sources instead of jumping between forums and articles. If something truly needs a professional opinion, bring it to your doctor or therapist instead of getting lost in internet spirals.
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4. Involve your partner in the process whenever you can
Having a child and OCD don’t have to be handled alone—especially if you have a partner who wants to support you. Dr. McGrath encourages couples to navigate this together. “It’s absolutely okay for both partners to attend therapy sessions,” he says. That might mean joining someone for an ERP session, learning how to spot compulsions, or simply talking about how OCD is affecting your day-to-day.
If your partner has OCD, consider asking how you can support their exposures or gently remind them when a compulsion is sneaking in. If you have OCD, let your partner know what kind of support is helpful and what feels like reassurance. It’s okay to not have all the answers—but learning together can reduce resentment, build connection, and make the pregnancy journey feel like a true team effort.
5. Make space for who you are outside of OCD and and having a child
When you’re preparing for a baby, it’s easy to feel like your whole identity is shifting. And when OCD is taking up mental space, it can feel like there’s nothing left for anything else. That’s why it’s important to make time for the parts of yourself that existed before this moment—and will exist after it, too.
“That’s good mental health advice in general,” Dr. McGrath says. OCD might try to convince you that hobbies, fun, or rest are distractions—but that’s just another trick to get you deeper into compulsions. Go for a walk. Watch a comfort show. Spend time with friends. These things are not only okay to do—they’re necessary. You’re still you, and you’re allowed to enjoy your life during this season.
6. Check in with each other beyond just new child talk
There’s a lot to track when you’re expecting: doctor’s appointments, milestones, to-do lists. But sometimes the most important check-ins are the simplest ones. How are you doing? What’s feeling heavy today? Is OCD showing up more lately?
Having a baby can put strain on any relationship, especially when OCD is involved. That’s why staying emotionally connected is key. You don’t have to fix each other’s anxiety or have the perfect response. Just showing up and listening can be enough to remind you both that you’re not alone in this.
7. Reach out for professional support if you need it
If things feel too overwhelming to manage on your own, reaching out for help is a sign of strength—not failure. OCD doesn’t care that your life is changing. It won’t sit back and give you a break—but that doesn’t mean you’re stuck.
“If you do notice that [OCD] is ramping up, reach out to a professional,” says Dr. McGrath. A therapist trained in exposure and response prevention (ERP) can help you understand what’s going on, build new tools, and move through this phase with more confidence. You don’t have to wait for things to get worse to get support.
Bottom line
Expecting a child is a big deal. And when OCD is along for the ride, it can make everything feel heavier. But that doesn’t mean you’re unequipped or alone. Whether you’re the one carrying the baby or the one standing beside them, you both have the ability to support each other through this.
OCD might get louder during this time—but it doesn’t get to call the shots. With the right tools, clear communication, and a little compassion, you can move forward as a team, one day at a time.