Delaying compulsions means increasing the amount of time between when an intrusive thought or obsession shows up and when you respond with a compulsion. The goal isn’t to suppress your thoughts or make the discomfort go away—it’s to build the skill of not reacting automatically, which weakens the OCD cycle.
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a mental health condition made up of two core symptoms: obsessions and compulsions. Obsessions are unwanted and recurrent intrusive thoughts, feelings, urges, images, and sensations that trigger the urge to perform compulsions—repetitive behaviors or mental acts meant to provide relief from anxiety. However, compulsions only exacerbate the cycle of OCD symptoms by teaching you that the only way to feel safe or certain is to perform these rituals.
Fortunately, treatment is available. Exposure and response prevention (ERP) therapy is a highly effective, evidence-based therapy designed for OCD, which helps you confront your fears and reduce compulsions over time. ERP therapy works by gradually exposing you to fears that cause anxiety, while teaching you response prevention techniques for resisting compulsions.
One helpful technique involves delaying compulsions, by increasing the time between the urge to engage in a ritualistic behavior and the act of actually engaging in that behavior. In doing so, you can slowly retrain your brain to tolerate uncertainty and discomfort. But what does it actually mean to delay a compulsion—and how does this work, when an urge feels urgent?
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What does it mean to delay compulsions?
Delaying compulsions means creating a longer gap between the urge to perform a compulsion and the act of engaging in the behavior, even if this delay only lasts for a few seconds or minutes, says licensed therapist Tracie Ibrahim, MA, LMFT, CST. “This can look like saying, “I’m not going to check that right now. I’m not going to solve that right now. Maybe I’ll do that in a couple of hours. Maybe I’ll do it tomorrow,”” she says.
The goal is not to immediately eliminate your compulsions. Instead, delaying compulsions helps you build tolerance to anxiety and uncertainty without relying on rituals for relief. Over time, you’ll want to learn how to stop relying on compulsions entirely. However, delaying compulsions can be a smaller, more manageable step toward getting there.
How to delay compulsions
Step 1: Self-awareness. Many compulsions can feel automatic—like second nature, so an important first step is learning to watch for your obsessions, and corresponding urges or behaviors.“First, you’ll bring awareness to the fact that you are about to do a compulsion, and then choose a different response,” says Ibrahim.
Consider: What are you doing, thinking, or feeling right before the compulsion happens? Are there patterns to when or where these urges show up? Being able to spot these moments gives you a window of opportunity—a moment to pause, reflect, and consider an alternative.
Step 2: Notify your therapist. Once you develop some self-awareness, your therapist can be a helpful way of staying accountable. Let them know what you’ve observed, and if an urge arises in session, fill them in on what’s going on. They can provide further advice on how to identify triggers and avoid reacting immediately.
Step 3: Practice delaying. To start, your therapist might set a timer on their phone for a couple of seconds to minutes, while you do your best to resist doing your compulsions until time is up. “If we’re looking to delay for a couple of seconds, I’ll count out loud while you sit with the discomfort,” says Ibrahim. “The goal isn’t to feel better right away, it’s to notice that you can feel the urge, sit with it, and choose not to respond.”
Step 4: Increase time. Now that you’ve tried delaying a compulsion, even by a few seconds, you’ll work with your therapist to increase the amount of time you’re delaying the behavior by. “Once we’ve done a couple of seconds, we can move up to a couple of minutes, and then to a couple of hours,” says Ibrahim. “Eventually, we want you to learn how to completely stop doing compulsions.”
Stopping compulsions altogether doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a gradual process that involves unlearning patterns your brain has leaned on for relief. ERP therapy gives you the structure and support to do this step by step—delaying first, then reducing, and eventually eliminating compulsions altogether.
Delaying compulsions can feel impossible, and it’s definitely easier said than done. So, don’t feel discouraged if you can’t do it right away or if you struggle at first. Progress in OCD recovery is rarely linear, and even small steps—like delaying by just a few seconds—are meaningful. Be patient with yourself and remember that learning to sit with discomfort is a skill that gets stronger with time and practice.
Examples of delaying compulsions
Here are some examples of delaying compulsions, which can help you build your tolerance to discomfort, and break the OCD cycle.
- If your compulsion is to wash your hands after touching a doorknob, try waiting 1-2 minutes before washing your hands. Gradually increase the delay to 5 minutes, then 10 minutes over time.
- If you mentally repeat a phrase to “cancel out” a bad thought, practice delaying the mental ritual by even 30 seconds to start.
- If you’re compelled to check the stove multiple times, try waiting a minute before checking again, and remind yourself of the last time you checked.
- If you feel the need to reread a message or email repeatedly, wait a few minutes before rereading—or try sending it after just one review.
Why delaying compulsions helps
Compulsions are a form of negative reinforcement, meaning that when you perform a compulsion, you’re reinforcing the idea that you need this behavior to survive the discomfort of your intrusive thought or obsession. This makes you more likely to experience the thought as extremely distressing in the future, and more likely to rely on the same compulsion—exacerbating the cycle.
Delaying compulsions disrupts this pattern. Even waiting a few seconds sends a new message to your brain: I can feel this discomfort and not respond right away—and nothing bad happens. Over time, as you increase the delay, you build up more tolerance for anxiety and uncertainty. This weakens the link between the obsession and the compulsions, helping to break the OCD cycle.
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Can you delay compulsions on your own?
While it’s important to learn the technique of delaying compulsions in ERP therapy with a specialist, you’ll likely want to practice it outside of your sessions. In fact, your therapist may even give you this challenge as homework.
“You can delay compulsions on your own if you can really hold yourself to it,” says Ibrahim. “It’s often best to have someone else count for you or set up a timer on their phone.” This can be a loved one, such as a partner, friend, or family member, who can help provide support and accountability.
However, it’s important to be mindful that the act of delaying—especially if you’re using specific time frames like five or ten minutes—doesn’t turn into a compulsion itself. If you find yourself needing to delay for an exact amount of time or feeling anxious if you don’t meet that number, you could be being too ritualistic about it. To prevent this, it’s helpful to vary the delay times and avoid using exact numbers consistently. The focus should be on building flexibility, not perfection.
This is another reason why it’s crucial to start ERP with a therapist, and might be helpful to have someone else count for you once you’re practicing response prevention on your own. That way, you’re not fixating on the time or using it as a form of reassurance.
Bottom line
Delaying compulsions can be overwhelming and difficult—especially when they feel automatic, in response to obsessions. But, even creating a small gap between the urge to do a compulsion and the act of doing it is a meaningful step. Pushing that delay by just a few seconds is an accomplishment. It means you’re starting to interrupt the OCD cycle and building tolerance to discomfort.