It’s common to feel some anxiety when gearing up for a move. After all, our homes often feel like the center of our universe. Whether you’re relocating down the block or to another continent, a significant change in your environment can feel destabilizing. “Moving can increase anxiety because of all the uncertainty and expectations that come with it,” says NOCD therapist Heather Brasseur, LMC, LPC.
Maybe you have jitters about leaving your childhood home for college. Perhaps you’re moving in with your partner, and worry about giving up your own space. Even if you’re excited about upgrading to a new apartment, you might find yourself experiencing intrusive thoughts that you’re making the wrong decision.
Sometimes these feelings are a result of the overall emotional, financial and physical toll of moving; in other cases they may be indicative of a deeper mental health issue, such as an anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), adjustment disorders or obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). In this article, we’ll look at how moving can impact mental health, why your anxiety may be feeling heightened, and discuss strategies for relieving pressure.
Why does moving make us anxious?
Physical, financial, and emotional stressors
Relocating is stressful. You might find yourself struggling to keep track of your to-do list, worrying about new roommate dynamics, or feeling the financial pressure. “Changes in your environment can feel overwhelming, and the physical work of moving can contribute to those feelings,” explains Brasseur. “Not knowing how things will turn out can leave people feeling unsure and anxious.”
Whether you’re moving for the first time or you’ve been through this before, it can be emotionally difficult to sort through possessions and say goodbyes.
Leaving behind places you’ve lived, visited, or cared about may also bring up a mix of sadness and fear.
Heather Brasseur
Simply thinking about everything you have to do—from packing, to saying goodbyes, to researching your new digs—can cause feelings of overwhelm.
Mental health issues
If you’re already dealing with a mental health condition, moving stress can feel especially hard. Generalized anxiety disorder and social anxiety disorder can contribute to higher levels of anxiety during a move, triggering intense concerns about acclimating to a new environment or being around new people. Anxiety disorders can also increase the chances of experiencing a panic attack.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can also make moving feel more difficult—especially if you’ve experienced trauma around relocation or housing in the past. If you’re navigating PTSD, severe anxiety may be accompanied by flashbacks, nightmares, and uncontrollable thoughts.
Adjustment disorders, which are related to PTSD, also typically emerge following traumatic experiences, and can cause people to react strongly to stress. While most people adjust to life changes like moving within a few weeks or months, people with adjustment disorders may experience symptoms of anxiety or depression for long after the change has occurred.
Finally, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is often characterized by intense discomfort with uncertainty, which can make moving especially difficult. This uncertainty “can intensify OCD symptoms in some individuals,” Brasseur says. Read on to learn more about how OCD can impact moving.
Moving with OCD
The two main symptoms of OCD are obsessions and compulsions. Obsessions take the form of unwanted thoughts, sensations, images, feelings, or urges, and often center on topics that cause significant distress. If your OCD is causing obsessions around moving, you might experience thoughts, like:
- “What if I missed something while packing?”
- “What if my items are not properly organized?”
- “What do I do if my new home isn’t what I hoped it would be?”
- “What if the neighborhood/area isn’t welcoming to me?”
- “What if my prized possessions get lost while moving?”
To manage the anxiety caused by obsessions, people with OCD perform compulsions—repetitive behaviors or mental acts done in an attempt to neutralize these distressing thoughts, or prevent a “bad thing” from happening. “However, these actions often increase distress rather than alleviate it…contributing to the cycle of OCD,” Brasseur explains.
OCD compulsions related to moving might include:
- Ruminating on everything that could potentially go wrong.
- Seeking reassurance from others that relocating is the correct decision.
- Excessively researching traffic and weather for the day of the move.
- Repeatedly checking and rechecking how items are packed.
- Avoiding or procrastinating packing, due to feelings of overwhelm.
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Hoarding OCD
One of the hardest parts of moving is dealing with all of your belongings. Going through personal items and furniture can present the opportunity to get rid of what no longer serves you, but it can also feel hard to throw things out— especially if you’re dealing with hoarding OCD. In contrast to hoarding disorder, people with hoarding OCD don’t typically stockpile stuff just because they believe it to be valuable; instead, they experience obsessive thoughts and anxiety centered around personal items. These thoughts might sound like:
- “These receipts are ten years old, but what if I need to go over my financial history later on?”
- “I probably don’t need all these old blankets, but what if the heat doesn’t work in the new apartment?”
- “My mom gave me this toaster. If I throw it away, something bad could happen to her.”
“For those with hoarding symptoms, deciding what to keep, discard, or donate during a move can be difficult,” Brasseur says. “The fear of making the wrong decision can increase distress, leading to [avoidance].”
Perfectionism OCD
Setting high—and sometimes unrealistic—expectations for the overall moving process can contribute to moving anxiety, explains Brasseur. For those dealing with perfectionism OCD, a subtype defined by a desire to carry out tasks until they feel perfect, moving can feel especially complicated. You might feel like you need to polish all your dishes until they’re spotless before you pack them. Or, you may spend hours rearranging all the boxes in your moving van until they feel perfectly packed.
Checking OCD
Checking OCD is characterized by a need to compulsively check and re-check actions, items, or one’s own memories. Maybe you find yourself constantly checking that your moving boxes are properly labeled. Perhaps you keep unpacking and packing boxes to check that your items are still in there. Or, maybe you keep returning to your old space, because you’re worried you left an appliance on.
Checking can manifest as obvious outward behaviors, like returning to re-lock your door, but it can also manifest as a mental behavior; you may find yourself replaying actions in your head to make sure you did everything correctly.
Managing moving anxiety
Moving is often stressful, but there are strategies for better managing overwhelm, anxiety—and even OCD symptoms. Read on to learn how to set yourself up for an easier move.
Logistical strategies
- Adequate planning: Set time aside in advance of your move to tackle tasks you can do ahead of time, like making checklists, decluttering your space, and researching moving companies. Pacing yourself will make the actual process of moving feel less overwhelming, and busying yourself with smaller tasks can help you stay present—a key strategy for fighting anxiety. “Focus on taking actionable steps instead of getting caught up in all the ‘what ifs,’” Brasseur says.
- Do a little at a time: Moving can feel like a massive endeavour, which may lead you to procrastinate. “Breaking the process down into smaller, more manageable tasks can reduce anxiety and make it feel less intimidating,” Brasseur says.
- Get help: Enlist friends and family to assist with packing, and consider hiring movers to help with the physical labor.
ERP therapy
If anxiety or obsessions and compulsions are making moving feel unbearable, consider exposure and response prevention (ERP) therapy. ERP is an evidence-based form of therapy that is effective for both OCD and anxiety. In ERP therapy, a specially-trained therapist will guide you as you gradually and deliberately face fears related to the moving process.
For example, if you are ruminating on fears that your possessions will get lost, Brasseur says you would work on practicing accepting this potential outcome. You might practice intentionally mislabeling one of your packed boxes, and sit with that discomfort—instead of turning to compulsions. “Life is unpredictable, and we cannot control the narrative through compulsive behaviors,” Brasseur explains.
While ERP exercises can be tough at first, it’s a highly effective form of therapy, and your therapist will be there to support you with any difficult emotions that arise. In time, you’ll build the resilience necessary to navigate the stress of moving with more ease. Once you reach your new home, ERP therapy can make sure you have the tools necessary to deal with any additional uncertainty.
Find the right OCD therapist for you
All our therapists are licensed and trained in exposure and response prevention therapy (ERP), the gold standard treatment for OCD.
Key takeaways
- It’s common to experience feelings of anxiety and stress during transitional periods—like a big move.
- While moving is rarely easy, mental health conditions such as anxiety disorders, PTSD, adjustment disorders and OCD can exacerbate feelings of overwhelm.
- Moving often creates feelings of heightened uncertainty that can exacerbate OCD symptoms.
- People with hoarding OCD, perfectionism OCD and checking OCD may be more prone to moving anxiety due to the obsessions and compulsions commonly seen in those subtypes.
- ERP therapy is effective for treating OCD, as well as anxiety.
